The Good Wife: "Don't Haze Me, Bro" and all that Swishiness

Episode Title: "Don't Haze Me, Bro"

Season 4, Episode 4 | Original Air Date: Sunday, October 21, 2012

______________________________________________________________

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness”… but most of all, it was the age of drama.

And that’s the best age of all. 

Goodbye 27^th floor, hello shared office space.  Goodbye clean slate, hello scandal.  Goodbye everything we've ever known, hello season 4.  With all of this messy drama, I’m pulling apart this week’s episode to look at ‘Don’t Haze Me, Bro’ as a turning-point for season four of The Good Wife.  Also, I've got some big questions, like: 1) Who is leaking to the press? And 2) Has Cary really been working in the lunchroom for the last two months?  Feel free to dig in with me by sounding off in the comments below.

His and Hers Offices

Diane is mad.  And apparently she eats Wheaties.  Both of these things are unusual and not just because I never pegged Diane for a cereal eater.  After going to review what’s left of the 27^th floor, Diane is more determined than ever to get Lockhart Gardner back on top.  It’s going to be a challenge, but I admire her for dreaming big.  First the firm will return to its former office space glory and then they’ll expand.  New York?  You bet.  The world?  Clearly the next stop.  The only one getting in the way?  That pesky Clarke Hayden. 

While Hayden seems to have a legitimate care and concern for Lockhart Gardner, Diane can’t help but think he’s undermining the firm’s success.  Yes, they need to hire an accountant who can actually, well, account, and sure they need to cut back on expenses – fresh flowers just don't grow on trees.  Well, they do, but they don't put themselves in vases, so that's the point – but when it comes to sharing office space, that’s where Diane draws the line.  One would think Diane would embrace the chance to share an office with Will.  Oh wait, that’s me. 

For fans of The Good Wife, I think it’s easy to see validation in having Hayden on staff.  He’s the voice of reason in an otherwise unreasonable world.  “At some point you’ll realize I’m trying to save you from yourself,” notes Hayden.  He’s more invested in the firm’s sustainability than the fair-weather David Lee, yet because he’s new to the scene, everyone loathes his suggestions.

Everyone but Cary Agos.

With the 27^th floor demolished, the seating arrangements at Lockhart Gardner are in a state of flux.  Hayden has a plan (and by the looks of it, a lot of agile workers willing move large mahogany furniture) to condense three floors to two.  It’s at this point we find out the beloved golden boy, Cary Agos, hasn't had a desk, filing cabinet, office chair or paperweight in two months.  Seriously?  Where has he been working?  The lunchroom?  Eli’s closet?  Will’s bathroom?  Does this man even have business cards?

Noting the injustice of seating, Hayden approaches Alicia to ask how she feels about Cary.  The review she gives is glowing and before long, Cary has moved into Alicia’s space.  Already it’s loud and full of madness, but this is a partnership that just might work.  Also, this could finally be the push needed to get Cary a bigger role on The Good Wife (something that has been missing). 

Now, I've said it before and I’ll say it again: These two are destined to start their own firm.  Sharing offices?  Step 1.  Welcome to the hallowed halls of Florrick Agos.  It has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?  I hear the 27^th floor is available for rent…

Pass the Gin and Titonic

There’s nothing worse than a bad date.  You know what I’m talking about: That moment when you look at your watch, secretly hoping the crab cake appetizer you just ate was tainted with listeria and that you’ll have an excuse to exit stage right because of near-death food poisoning?  Watching Alicia’s drink date with Maddie was like that… but maybe worse.  No amount of gin could cover how awkward things got when Alicia brought up Peter’s campaign and his supposed fidelity.  Why didn't she stick with her gut instinct and leave it to Maddie to bring up politics?  Why did she feel the need to justify her marriage to Peter?  Why did she have to kiss him in the last episode?  Whhhhhhy?

I’ll be the first to admit I have some not-so pent-up angst about Peter, but Alicia unwittingly sabotaging a budding friendship with Maddie because of Peter was so disheartening. I hope these two get a second round at the local watering hole - this is a relationship Alicia needs.

The Return of Jackie Florrick

A cold wind was blowing today and I couldn't help but think, Jackie Florrick is near. Like the cat who came back the very next day, Jackie continues to surface just when you've resigned to the fact she’ll have to be treacherous from a hospital bed.  This week, her pearls were clasped, her hair was pinned and her lipstick had a perfect lustre.  The only thing missing? The Jackie we’ve come to know.  Since her stroke she has been struggling with her senses and her confused reality.  It’s true, she’s always lived in a bit of a delusional world, where Peter walked on water, but it’s always been about what she wanted to believe, not what her mind was convincing her into.  Now she’s seeing bugs crawling across her speeches and doing the backstroke in her wine.  She’s tearing up over Alicia’s loyalty and zoning out while composing simple sentences. 

This is not the Jackie Florrick we've come to know and love to hate. 

This development is going to take The Good Wife into an entirely new world – a place where the lines between lies and truth are blurred, where darkness eludes light and where reality is superseded by imagination.  On second thought, maybe Jackie’s new-found issues are a direct reflection of Peter’s campaign.  Either way, it’s going to be a sad road for Jackie, but it’s sure to be interesting for Peter, Alicia, Eli and the viewers.

And the Best Scene of the Night Goes to…

Eli Gold and his epic meltdown while on the phone to Jim Moody (who we haven’t seen in a while, but it’s sure nice to know he’s back on the campaign trail!).

When discussing Jackie and her Peter has always has many women around-inspired speech: “Beat her off with a 2x4 if you have to!” 

Oh Eli Gold, welcome back.

Who is Leaking to the Press?

It’s the straw poll party.  American flags are flying, people are eating sausages cut into coins skewered on those little plastic-ended toothpicks and voters are hip-hip-hooraying all things Peter Florrick.  Well, all people but Eli.  Why?  Because he just got a call from ‘Jimmy V,’ a blogger with PoorAnarchy.com and the news isn't good.  Let’s face it though: Eli’s phone rarely brings good news (Jackie botched a speech, Peter slept with an intern, the Kung Pow Palace is all out of ginger beef – you know, the result is always the same).  In any case, Jimmy V says he is going to run with a story that a magazine he knows, is sitting on an article of Peter’s new scandal.  It’s going to press in one hour.  Click. Say what?!

My first question:  Who leaked this story?  I have three lines of thought here: 1) Kalinda.  It's a unlikely yet fascinating theory to ponder.  She is out to protect Alicia and she's pro-team Gardner.  Could she be working for Eli and clearing scandals on one side the fence while slipping information to a local blogger on the other?  2) Maggie.  She's in a mood that Eli rained on her Peter parade and this is one way all her work would still pay off.  3) Miss Star - the campaign worker accusing Peter of the hotel visit.  She's mad about Kalinda accusing her of lying and she knows people are looking into her story.  She could have easily spilled the beans on the article.

My second question: Why does Eli answer his phone when ‘unknown caller’ surfaces?  Okay, sure, it’s his business to be responsive, but the way the camera menacingly panned down to the call display, we could all tell it was going to be bad news. 

Other Notables

• The case of the week: Chicago PolyTech vs. Lockhart Gardner.  In a case about hazing and bullying, this week’s in-court drama was another stunning example of art imitating life.  Judge Brochard was just the right amount of quirky while looking shockingly similar to Jimmy Kimmel.  Please tell me I’m not the only one who noticed?
• The use of ‘swishiness.’  Chummy the Gopher (squirrel?) last week, “swishy” this week – The Good Wife never ceases to entertain and educate.  I’m sure the people over at Merriam-Webster are busy crafting a new entry as I type: The act of not being gay while being feminine, or being gay while not appearing as such = swishy.
  
• Kalinda is busy working for Eli who is, as we all know, is busy working for Peter.  It’s deliciously awkward without Eli even knowing it.  This is story line is like a slow-ticking time bomb.  Ka-boom!

Up Next: "Waiting for the Knock"

"When you protect the devil, prepare for hell."  Consider me intrigued. 

One of my favourite characters is about to return: Lemond Bishop is back and things seem dodgier than ever.  Next week we're taken to Bishop's house, a place we've never seen but are about to become intimately acquainted with (and, which looks strikingly similar to Highland Park, no?).  Bishop's son is the single most important person in his life, so watching how his illegitimate business might interfere with his master plan is just the kind of inspired drama I've been looking for.  Also, let's not forget when last we saw Bishop he was threatening Kalinda to get the FBI off his back.  Could K be able to use Bishop as a pawn in her game to oust Nick from her life?  Let the countdown to "Waiting for the Knock" to begin!

Related to this Post:

• Catching up: ‘One Girls, Two Codes’ – Isn't Life Chummy?
• The Latest Briefs: What's happening with The Good Wife this week?
• Food Inspired by TheGood Wife: Coming soon

"Two Girls, One Code" - Isn't Life Chummy?

Episode Title: "Two Girls, One Code" - Isn't Life Chummy?

Season 4, Episode 3 | Original Air Date: Sunday, October 14, 2012

______________________________________________________________

Having spent the last week listening to Joan Osborne’s version of ‘Midnight Train to Georgia’ (and dreaming about this year’s delicious season… don’t judge), my blood pressure was sufficiently off the charts for, “Two Girls, One Code.”  Why?  This face:

Honestly… look at him.  His tie collection alone is cause for anther nomination for Chicago’s Most Eligible Bachelor list (which is perhaps a strategic move… making him more handsome than ever before, now that he’s back to business with Alicia, though still completely in love with her? Right…?!).  

Okay, I could spend my entire post talking about Team Gardner (and don’t worry, I probably will) but this week marked the culmination of all that’s great about The Good Wife.  The moments when I scream at my TV, stand up in shock, cover my face out of disbelief and frustration and those times when I’m forced to triple underline a scene that exceeded my expectations (Kalinda, Peter and Eli on the campaign bus, anyone?  Hello awkward, we haven’t seen you since everyone was in the elevator back in “The Dream Team”) – these are the moments that make for television gold and the ones when I sit back and think, “Could I love this show ANY more?”  The answer is no.  But then again, when things are complicated, they can always get better.

This week, I’m featuring the top six scenes from “Two Girls, One Code”… my favourite episode, so far, in season four.

1) Behind Closed Doors with Alicia Florrick

The scene (with slight liberties taken on dialogue): Eli is found sitting in Alicia’s office (on what appears to be a new and very nice couch).  Alicia walks in.

Eli: Remember when I used to sleep on your couch? 

Alicia: How could I forget?  That was always awkward.  Kind of like where I see this going… 

Eli: Enough with the small talk.  I’ve been avoiding talking to you about it… ever… especially since I intercepted Will’s ‘I love you’ voice mail back in season one, but… 

Alicia: By ‘it’ you mean…? 

Eli: You and Will.  I’d rather be chatting about anything else right now. 

Alicia: Okay. 

Eli: Mandy Post, the reporter, wants to talk to you about your… affair. Her word.  Mandy, she seems to have a copy of a hotel receipt for a September 30, 2011… encounter… and I need to know if that timing makes sense. 

Alicia: I don’t know. (But in reality, we all know she does) 

Eli: Is there any chance you could look into things?  I mean, remember when you came bounding off the elevator with your new haircut last year? I’m pretty sure the timing of that could have something do with the spring in your step and what Mandy is after. 

Alicia: Is she going to press with this? 

Eli: She hopes to, and I hope to stop her. 

Alicia: Can you?  I mean, you got rid of Becca – could Mandy really be any cleverer? 

Eli: I don’t know, but you’re right, Becca was terrible.  Then again, she was 16.  Let me put it this way: If you are still seeing Will, you need to stop… for a time (side note: Really, Eli? “For a time?”  His commitment to a harmonious campaign has hit a whole new high with this statement.  He’s not asking Alicia to stop seeing Will altogether – that he doesn’t care about – he just doesn’t want to it to go public.) 

Alicia: I’m not seeing him (insert teary-eyed glance out the window, matched only by my own teary-eyed stare down of the television) 

Eli: Good (said with an almost apologetic expression as if to say, ‘I’m sorry.’  *Sigh.* I’m sorry too, Eli, I’m sorry, too).  Can I ask when it ended? 

Alicia: No. (She exits her office and lunges for the closing elevator.  The doors close as she puts her head against the wall, in a way slightly reminiscent of when Kalinda cried for the first and only time, after Alicia confronted her about the affair with Peter).  

 Oh sweet love, how I adore these elevator moments.

End scene.

That is, until Alicia talks to Will about the receipt.  Suddenly all of the Team Gardner goodness we’ve (I’ve) enjoyed so much in the past is coming back in an almost haunting way.  Alicia feels cursed, and not just because of her annoying ringtone that she finally changed after the Jesus-napping (but yes, that), but because in many ways she feels as though she can’t catch a break.  Then, as if the knife needs to be twisted any more, Will asks Alicia if she’s okay and reaches for her hand just as she turns.  More bad timing.

Right now, the Team Gardner bandwagon is a sad place to be.  Looking at Will’s face is all the confirmation one needs to confirm this fact:

2) The Case of the Campaign Bus Investigator

With Eli in a jam with this dastardly Mandy, he has nothing left to do but call upon the trusty (though slightly less reliable these days) Kalinda.  Using the guise of ‘protecting Alicia from unjust reporting,’ Eli convinces Kalinda to spend the afternoon doing what she does best: making omelettes sleuthing.  Labeling her as his “assistant,” Kalinda takes to the streets to get to the bottom of the mysterious hotel receipt that apparently doesn't have to do with Will and Alicia at all. Of course, the first stop on Kalinda’s investigative journey is the heart of the Florrick campaign: the bus.  Apparently a 2011 campaign worker accused Peter of sleeping with her at the St. Martin.  Maybe she’s lying, maybe she’s not, but at the end of the day, we’re all a little skeptical about Peter’s past.  I know, I know, he went to prison therefore he’s a changed man.  Well, he’s also the man that ripped Gerald Kozko’s shirt off in church only to find him wearing a wire.  Remember that?  Changed?  I don’t know.  Remorseful?  Maybe.

As Kalinda goes through the campaign supporter team photo she’s instantly able to identify a girl who looks, believe it or not, a bit like Amber Madison.  Peter has a type… and it’s not Alicia.  For that matter, it’s not Kalinda either, so his type is also a little flexible.  Just as Eli gives K the go-ahead to track down Madison Junior, Peter climbs aboard his home-away-from-home.  The shock on his face when he finds these two working together?  Worth the price of admission.  Is he worried?  You bet.  Sure, he’s playing it cool, oh yes, Kalinda… we worked together at the State’s Attorney’s Office, but it’s only because Eli can’t ever find out about his affair with K.  If he did, Eli’s apologetic glance in Alicia’s direction about her quashed romance with Will might turn more into advocacy for her ultimate happiness, of which Eli seems to have a genuine affinity.     

3) “The problem, Peter, is I don’t give a damn.”

Delivered with the strength of character only Alicia has, this quote says it all.  While Peter tries to convince Alicia he’s not in the wrong and that Mandy’s lead is a fake, it doesn't matter.  As much as Alicia has come to accept Peter and his shortcomings, she’ll also never fully trust him.  She has made a commitment to stick with him through the campaign, and much to my chagrin, they seem to be getting along reasonably well. And no, I’m not going to address all of this bus affection that seems to be happening in the Team Florrick camp.  Forgiving and forgetting are two very different things – Alicia’s in a very interesting spot.

Prediction: Amber and Kalinda aren't Peter’s only indiscretions – they are just the only ones that have been caught.  He dodged a bullet here, but he won’t be able to forever, mark my words.  The campaign supporter was a fraudster (and really should have taken lessons from Becca who was much stealthier when it came to the art of deception), but we all know his past isn't squeaky clean.  It’s only a matter of time before the next scandal surfaces. 

4) 10 points for tech-savvy judges

Okay, I’ll confess this favourite scene isn't pertaining to a specific moment, but rather to the entire case involving Lockhart Gardner’s tech nemesis, Neil Gross (John Benjamin Hickey) and his oft-conniving lawyer, Viola Walsh (Rita Wilson).  When I hear the words Chum Hum, I get all fuzzy inside.  Why?  Because 1) it usually means a great case and 2) who doesn't like the name Chum Hum?  Oh, right.  Everyone.  It’s weird.  Yet still, I like it.  This week, we also met Chum Hum’s mascot, Chummy the Gopher.   Will called it a squirrel, which instantly made me love him more (Will, not Chummy) but the best part of all was spending the entire hour watching Judge Michael Marx (Dominic Chianese) school the courtroom on his deep understanding of search engines and code optimization.  With Will still getting his feet wet since the suspension, this was just the judge he needed when going up against Gross and Walsh.   The best part?  Will's never played basketball with Marx, so there's no way this can come back to haunt him.  I think.

5) “You’ve been paranoid for so long, you don’t recognize when someone is on your side”

With last week’s lay-offs and this week's renting out of the Lockhart Gardner boardroom, there’s almost nothing Clarke Hayden won’t do to make the firm some extra cash.  Clearly he hasn't spent enough time in Alicia’s office though, otherwise I’m sure he’d have her camel-colored couture couch listed on Ebay faster than Kalinda can crack an egg with one hand (which, by the way, was seriously impressive).  The surprising twist?  Viola approaching Hayden, thinking she could get him on her side with a lower settlement than the case was worth.  

With Cary not doing much more than acting as a poster child for “returning associates who lurk in the wings,” he spotted Walsh and Clarke in the throngs of discussion and reported it back to Diane.  Sure, it was a little tattle tale-y, but with everyone getting the ax  Cary’s busy trying to prove his worth and not end up ousted from the firm for a second time.  Enter Diane in a fabulous blazer and an attitude worthy of an Emmy, ready to confront Clarke who, as it turns out, isn't easily wooed by the likes of opposing lawyers.  But why would he be?  He works for Lockhart Gardner and he’s there to get them out of the little hole we like to call bankruptcy.   Clarke Hayden, you’re quickly moving up the ranks to become one of my favourite new members of the Lockhart Gardner team.  Just stick around for the Christmas party – it’s going to be fun.

6) Omelettes for Two

So, Kalinda’s culinary specialty is an omelette?  I didn't see that coming.  The fact she can crack an egg with one hand is equally surprising and impressive.  Not that much that she does isn't impressive – she’s basically a leather-clad superhero in amazing heels – I just didn't know she could cook.

Flash forward to a little canoodling with Lana Delaney (Jill Flint).  With creepy Nick stalking Kalinda’s every move (I wonder if he was lurking outside Peter’s campaign bus earlier?  Probably siphoning gas...), we quickly learn he has a jealous streak (surprise, surprise) and doesn't like the idea of K making omelettes for anyone else, least of all another woman.  Kalinda’s response?  1) A punch in the face and 2) accepting the challenge head-on – with Lana as a federal agent, anything Nick does will come with serious consequences.  Bring it on.

What did you think of "Two Girls, One Code?"  Favourite scenes?  Sound off in the comments below!

Related to this Post:

• "And the Law Won" - Saying Goodbye to the 27th Floor
• Food Inspired by The Good Wife - This week's feature: The Perfect Omelette
• The Latest Briefs - News from The Good Wife

"And the Law Won" - Saying Goodbye to the 27th Floor

Episode Title: "And the Law Won"

Season 4, Episode 2 | Original Air Date: Sunday, October 7, 2012

______________________________________________________________

“And the Law Won” was a marriage of all good things: a great case, a stealthy jury, three former Gilmore Girls stars, the threat of bankruptcy, office politics, a Team Gardner in-court match-up, a broken mirror, a patriotic campaign bus, ice cream cones and a well-dressed, politically-savvy landlord looking to make friends.  This episode had everything but the kitchen sink... and an elevator.  Well, there’s always next week (a lot more about that later).

This week, I’m featuring Things I Loved and Things I Could Have Loved More: A Reaction Round-Up.  The cherry on top: The Top Three Scenes Season Four is Missing and a preview worthy of some serious fanfare.   Now, let’s jump right in. 

“And the Law Won” Reaction Round-Up: Things I Loved

Welcome to The Good Wife, Maddie Hayward – It’s the moment viewers and fans have been waiting for: Maura Tierney’s Good Wife debut.  I had hoped Tiereney’s character would be sharp, bright and full of potential.  Apparently, good things come to those who wait, because Maddie Haward channeled all of these characteristics and so much more.  In just one episode, Hayward has established herself as a shrewd business woman (sorry Diane, but you’re losing your 27^th floor… no lease negotiations, even for those who send in their ringer) and a clever investor (it seems as though the Florrick campaign can pay Eli and put gas in the bus.  Things are already better than they were two years ago when Kraft Dinner and Kinkos were the day’s highlights). 

The best part?  Maddie’s looking for a friend - and not a friend with benefits as Alicia had originally thought (years of late night drinks with Kalinda have really changed Alicia’s perspective on, well, apparently everything).  Is Maddie flexible?  No.  Well, maybe (I mean, she looks like she could be into palates… but so does Eli, and I have no proof of that either).  The thing I love about her already is that she isn’t like any of Alicia’s other friends (of which there are few).  Maddie is genuine.  She’s successful.  She’s not afraid to ask the hard questions (prostitutes vs. policy?) or go out on a limb, as she did in asking Alicia out for a drink.  Maddie Hayward, welcome to the 27^th floor.

Goodbye Mergers and Acquisitions – Clarke Hayden is like a wrecking ball in a city of ancient architecture… and I love it!  His equal disdain for everyone (with one notable exception) is a feast for the senses.  He’s all about pitting people against each other and seeing who will play along.  The whole situation reminds me of the scene in ‘You've Got Mail’ when Meg Ryan is jumping around her Little Shop Around the Corner and air boxing while the words “Fight.  Fight to the death!” echo in the background. The only thing about him that’s deliciously ambiguous is his seeming interest in Alicia’s opinions.  For now, it is goodbye M&A.  I just hope Hayden doesn't realize Legal Aid is hiding-out up on 29 with Eli and his espresso maker…

Gardner & Florrick, Attorneys at Law – It has been awhile since we had the pleasure of seeing Will and Alicia tag-teaming a defense and what a welcome addition it was to such a great case.  Protesters, tag dots, Tasers and rogue jurors were just the beginning for Will’s first case back from suspension.  Now that Diane knows the Team Gardner flame has been extinguished (ish), she’s all for these two getting back to their roots: the courtroom.  Diane to Alicia: “He’s better when he has someone to impress.”  Fair enough.  Game on.

When Mice Explode -  If there’s one thing you can always count on with The Good Wife, it’s that you never know when an ‘ah ha’ moment is going to strike.  This week, that treasured glimpse took place in the courtroom against Lionel Deerfield in the form of Alvatil.  Seasoned viewers will remember this drug as having had numerous show appearances, not the least of which included a memorable video of exploding mice.   It’s moments like these that make The Good Wife so dynamic.  As an audience, the mention of Alvatil suddenly made us equals with Alicia and Will, if only for a minute.  We knew where the case was going, because we’d seen it argued before.  For once, we had the facts – the tabbed binder of research, case law and arguments  – and we felt like an active participant in the courtroom.  Or, at least I did.  I’m not alone, am I?

Riding in Campaign Buses with Husbands – It’s different than riding in cars with boys (especially when you've got Eli Gold sitting shotgun and making cracks about King Leer), but in some ways it’s the same.  The closing scene of ‘And the Law Won’ was sweet and candid as we watched Alicia and Peter interact in a way we can only imagine they did 20 years ago.   Of course, I do feel as though The Good Wife writers are trying mightily to make me a Team Florrick believer, what with throwing in sidelong glances, Alicia’s laugh with Peter’s smile and "A Midnight Train to Georgia" with the lyrics ‘a simpler place and time’ playing in the background.  This scene was maybe one of my favourite Peter/Alicia moments in the history of The Good Wife.  I won’t ever be a convert (when I pick a bandwagon, I’m usually the first one on and last one off… Team Gardner has my loyalty wrapped up with a bow), but I’m happy to give credit where credit is due:  The family Florrick looked good tonight. 

“And the Law Won” Reaction Round-Up - Things I Could Have Loved More

Kalinda PI, MIA – I’m grappling with a serious bout of guilty conscience here.  Before season four premiered I was filled with excitement and suspense and the prospect of meeting Kalinda’s husband.  Let me just say this: It’s not a wonder she burned his clothes and left town when she did.  I don’t blame her.  This guy is awful (and not just because he creepily downed a whole bottle of San Pellegrino in Alicia’s office, but yes, that too).  I’ve always loved Kalinda, but this story line is becoming 50 shades of too-muchery.  The worst part about all of it is that she’s disappointing Will.  That never happens.  The best part of Kalinda this episode was watching her make her way through rows of bodies like a nimble third-grader in a complex obstacle course.  That should never be the best part about Kalinda.  Her cat-like instincts should just be an aside. 

Diane vs. Alicia – The Later Years – I’m not entirely sure what happened this week when it came to Diane and Alicia, but I think it was political and I’m not sure I liked it.  Correction.  It was and I didn't   Diane and Alicia are better together than they are at odds and I’m rather certain almost everyone agrees.  While it has always been the firm’s position that having Alicia on staff was a nice fringe benefit, even when the optics aren’t ideal, Diane has never been one to force her name on a situation to alter an outcome.  I understand, the situation at Lockhart Gardner is tenuous at best, but still.  Diane as a mentor is better than Diane as a nemesis, at least when it comes to Alicia.  Throw Louis Canning in the room, and we might have a different story…

The Top Three Scenes Season Four is Missing

• Trigonometry and Trains – Remember Grace’s tutor, Jennifer?  The one in the neon spandex who liked to eat chocolate bars and train/street/curb/alley dance for YouTube?  Where is she?  With all of these Gangnam Style shenanigans flying around lately, I’m only left to imagine what Jennifer is busy doing when she should be working on calculus.  Can you say, ‘filming a Florrick campaign support video?’  Oh how I hope.
• An Interview with Julius Cain - So far, the only key person we haven’t seen Clarke Hayden talk to is Julius Cain and I, for one, am yearning for a bit of Cain vs. Lee action again this year.  As Julius is one of the more sensible equity partners, I can’t help but wonder where he is during all of these layoffs.  Theories?
• Cary Agos, Where Art Thou? - We know he’s around.  I mean, he’s been interviewed by Hayden and he’s been doing Kalinda’s investigative work while she’s been lurking in ice cream parlors, but we’re left with absolutely nothing else to comment on.  Sure, (spoiler alert) there is word that Cary’s Dad is coming town, but that’s all.  Get this man a story line.  Or another ficus.  Or a part-time job as a barista.  Anything.  Please.  He’s too good (and too handsome) to go with so little airtime. 

Up Next: Two Girls, One Code.

First things first: The Preview.

Okay. You have my attention.  Writers of The Good Wife, I’m looking at you.  We’re back to some Team Gardner drama and I’m already losing my mind, two episodes and one preview in.  Seriously.  Word on the street is that one of Will and Alicia’s hotel visits has been leaked.  Just imagine if it’s the receipt for the whopping $7,800 suite Will splurged for at the end of season two.  If so, all bets are on Jerome, their personal butler for spreading the news.  If not, all bets are off.  While the preview shows Eli talking to Alicia about the situation, it’s not entirely clear if Peter knows.  Let’s face it, Peter + Alicia = happy campaign, happy Eli.  It’s basic math.  Eli isn't going to tell Peter if he doesn't have to… which he doesn't.   For someone who loves good drama, I’ll confess to having my first preview related meltdown of the season. #HolyTeamGardnerGoodness, I think yes.  This is going to be one gigantic can of worms.  Let’s do this! 

Related to this Post:

• The Good Wife Season Four Premiere: "I Fought the Law" aka Three Knocks, Two Guns, One Sledgehammer
• The Latest Briefs: The Good Wife News
• Food Inspired by The Good Wife: Fall for Pumpkin Ice Cream

"I Fought the Law" aka 3 Knocks, 2 Guns, 1 Sledgehammer

Episode Title: "I Fought the Law" aka Three Knocks, Two Guns, One Sledgehammer

Season 4, Episode 1 | Original Air Date: Sunday, September 30, 2012

______________________________________________________________

154 days.  That’s how long we’ve waited for this season four premiere.  That’s 3,696 hours of wondering who could be on the other side of Kalinda’s door and 221,716 minutes of pondering whether or not Alicia went back in the house for pizza (a situation that has been keeping me up, according to my quick calculations, for much too long!).

Okay, so I’m the first to admit I’ve clearly spent a few too many hours thinking/dreaming about my favourite fictional characters (and continuing to yearn for a glimmer of Team Gardner love, *sigh,*… and yes, I’m still championing that bandwagon) – but I’m also the first to admit it has been time well spent.  With “I Fought the Law” in the record books, I can unequivocally state:  The 154 day wait was worth it… even if I spent more spare time rewatching past episodes than I did, say, reading War and Peace.  At the end of the day, the lessons I’ve learned from watching Kalinda high-kick her nemeses is probably more valuable anyways… right?

This week I’m going taking a look at the highs and lows of this much anticipated season premiere.  Weigh in with your thoughts using the comments section below!

“I Fought the Law” – The Highlights

Three knocks, two guns, one sledgehammer:  Need I say more?  My adoration of Kalinda continues to grow with each throat-jabbing elevator fight.  Pa chow!  She showed the henchman at the door, Bill, who was boss (no surprise, it wasn't him), and I loved every minute of it.

What’s $60 million?:  Finally. We have a number to put on Lockhart Gardner’s latest financial crisis: $60 million.  Seeing Diane in bankruptcy court was enough to make me want to write a strongly worded letter to the head of Lockhart Gardner’s accounting department to ask how they could have let things get so out of control.  Remember when they enforced the ‘self hydration policy’ in season two, whereby eliminating bottled water?  I thought that was going to fix everything (and by everything I mean global warming AND their financial trouble).  Failing that plan working, one would think having Chicago’s biggest drug lord as a top client (spoiler alert: Lemond Bishop will be back later this season!) they’d be swimming in cash.  Oh. Right. They only manage his reputable business interests.  Dry cleaners don’t make that much money in ligation matters (and I speak from experience here, having once successfully sued my dry cleaner). 

Alicia and Cary, Friends On: Can I just take a moment to say how thrilled I am to see Florrick and Agos back on the same side of the fence?  Talk about a dream team: These two have a tremendous working chemistry and are going to be a force to be reckoned with in the courtroom.  The one thing that’s most interesting about their relationship in ‘I Fought the Law’ was the level of vulnerability Alicia was comfortable showing around Cary.  She’s stoic and poised with almost everyone else, but when telling Cary about Zach’s run-in with Officer Robb, all that went out the window.

Lockhart Gardner’s Latest Splurge: And I’m not talking about their art work, their office furniture, or their water cooler stations.  I’m talking about their new elevator.  Wait. What?  The offices of Lockhart Gardner have always had the same elevators – we’ve all seen dozens of scenes play out in these very intimate, metal-clad spaces.  This year, however, a new elevator has been introduced.  It’s wood-paneled and, apparently, perfect for a brawl.  For that reason alone, I'm willing to give it a shot.  The elevators in my office aren't nearly as interesting.

Alicia – Canine Examiner: Alicia starring at the drug-sniffing dog, starring at her.  A simply delicious scene opening.  Side note: how did Alicia know Kalinda was tight with a canine expert?  #ThingsThatDontComeUpOverTequila

Welcome, Peggy Byrne and Clarke Hayden: The reporter and the trustee.  What could go wrong?  Well, probably everything.  First off, Peggy likes to pry (alarm bells are seriously ringing over the fact she wants to talk to Will and not Diane) and Clarke seems to hate everyone, but especially David Lee (so really, his taste isn’t all bad).  And, as much as I trust Will when he says things like, 'Don't worry, I've got this' when it comes to Peggy's questioning, we all know something's going to go wrong.  Just wait.  Lockhart Gardner is about to be the zebra at the watering hole.  I'll bet my $60 million it.

Kalinda’s Cupboards:  I know K told Nick she put everything in storage, but part of me thinks she doesn’t ever keep that much in her pantry.  I mean, Kalinda’s not really the ‘come over for a morning coffee and I’ll cook you brunch’ type.  Note: Is it just me, or was anyone else excited to see the only thing in her fridge was a glass bottle of milk?  Flash to season one, when Kalinda would carry glasses of milk around the office instead of, say, water, coffee or scotch, like her colleagues.  K’s preference for milk has always been a mystery (at least to me), so to see it surface again after two years was a little heartwarming.

Zach Florrick vs. Officer Robb:  Putting Zach on the highlights list was a difficult decision -  I mean, I’ve spent the better part of two seasons thinking he was hindering more than helping most things (in contrast to Grace who hindered more than helped ALL things.  Oy vey.   I’m still not over season three’s, ParentingMade Easy.  Not even after 154 days of extra forgiveness).  That said, I’m glad to see Zach is back in investigator mode, looking to help out Eli and his Dad’s campaign, along with working all the resources he has at his fingertips (hello Chum Hum… nice to see you again) to turn his ‘obstruction of justice’ offence back on Madison County and the smarmy Officer Robb. 

Eli, Peter and a Campaign Bus: Peter is back on the road and more determined than ever.  Okay, let’s face it: Peter was downright scary when talking to the State’s Attorney of Madison County, Phil Tapia.  Peter’s not joking when he says he’ll do anything to protect his family.  We know a new scandal is in the works when it comes to this shady dealer… who’s to say it’s not a body under the floorboards?

Three, two, one: Will’s back – pass the scotch!

Champagne to Celebrate: One word. Squeeeeee!  Alicia bringing Will a bottle of champagne to celebrate the end of his suspension was just the kind of magic I’d been hoping for!  Sure, he didn’t know about it, but that’s the least important part of this gesture.  Alicia is still Will’s number one fan even if things are, as they say, complicated.  Put that champagne in your desk drawer Alicia – I foresee some late nights in your future.  With any luck, Will might just be sharing some of your files.

“I Fought the Law” – The Lowlights

Zach’s ‘chicken rap:’  You know what I’m talking about: Those crazed beats he was blasting in the car before pulled over.  Chances are it was Grace’s pick (Internet Jesus approved?), but I’ll let them split the blame on this one.  The fact Alicia could sleep through the clucky music was a testament to either: 1) her level of exhaustion or 2) the quality of her dreams.

David Lee – You’re in then you’re out: David Lee reminds me Titanic’s Bruce Esmay – you know, the man who comfortably secured his spot on a lifeboat while hundreds of women and children were left to sink on that fateful night?  If there’s one thing Mr. Lee is, it’s an opportunist.  Honestly, he could have been pilfering the millions Lockhart Gardner now owes, just from some bottom-line back room deals.   

The Honesty Policy: Nick, Kalinda’s ex is back in town, Alicia and Cary are meeting with him over his alleged “Tow Truck Company” and K is pretending like he’s just another client.  Please, please, please Kalinda – tell Alicia at least a little about the situation before this turns into a breach of your friendship contract.  Before long, I’m sure Andrew Wiley will be lurking in the wings looking to break the story.

Up Next:

What comes after 'I Fought the Law?'  "And The Law Won," of course.  Next week, we're in for some drama as Kalinda breaks the news to Alicia that Nick the tow-truck client is actually her husband.  Will Kalinda be able to hide all of her many war wounds before Alicia spots one and begins to realize how serious Kalinda's past really is?  It might only be a matter of time before Kalinda is sleeping on Alicia's couch with the guards Peter has hired posted outside to keep all of them safe.  That's purely speculative, of course, but then again, I have a whole seven more days to dream...

Related to this post:

• The Latest Briefs: Catch up on the latest news from The Good Wife
• Food Inspired by The Good Wife: Kalinda's favourite beverage (next to tequila, of course!): Milk... and milk shakes!
• Find out why 2012 is the year of Christine Baranski
• Season Four Episode 2 Promo: "And The Law Won"